Only in her dreams
by no73
Summary: He never noticed, it was as if she wasn't there. It was only in her dreams that he saw her. *rated M for future chapters
1. Chapter 1

Molly sat alone again. She seemed to spend all her time alone but tonight was meant to be different. Tonight she should have been out with Jim. He had said he would meet her at the fox but she had sat there all alone nursing a drink until he had sent a text saying he wasn't coming

.

Earlier today Sherlock had said Jim was gay. Surely he was joking Jim had been nothing but attentive until tonight. She hadn't even noticed Jim. He had come to her, he had bought her coffee, then lunch, then flowers. He had sent her texts and left her notes and been just so sweet. Yet here she was once again on a Friday night sat on her own.

Taking a deep breath she stood up and made her way out of the crowded pub and headed back home. She may as well change into something more comfortable. In fact she may as well go finish the work she had left half done so she could get ready for the date.

73~73

Dressed now in jeans and jumper Molly grabbed her bag and keys and left the flat. As she walked down the stairs to the tube she took her oyster card out of her coat pocket and in one movement was through the barriers without even slowing down. Most of the other passengers were tourists heading into town for the night life, Molly kept her head down and made eye contact with no-one.

As she entered her lab Molly saw the microscope Sherlock had been using earlier still on the bench. She was sure she'd put it away but she had been excited and distracted so maybe not. Closing her eyes and breathing in she could almost smell Sherlock's aftershave. He had been his normal self today. Shoving his opinions at her then looking shocked when she got upset. Even John looked shocked at his suggestion that Jim was gay. He must be wrong mustn't he?

Moving quickly to tidy, which she should have done earlier, Molly let her mind wander. She loved the peace at this time of night, no interruptions, no phones; just her and her work. That was one thing she could identify with Sherlock over. He had the same focus and drive. She loved watching him work. He was so intense. The afternoon she had watched him with that whip still haunted her dreams. Not that she was into that sort of thing, in fact what he was doing almost hadn't registered, she had been so focused on his muscles moving as he swung the whip she could still picture it.

But if she were honest Jim didn't haunt her dreams like Sherlock, she didn't wake in the night almost panting in excitement at the dreams featuring Jim. No Jim was nice and safe. Texts and flowers and calls.

Deciding she was not going to get much done in the way of work Molly pulled out her files and began filling in the paperwork she had neglected. The florescent lights of the lab were beginning to make her eyes ache. Perhaps she was just tired. Moving to get some coffee Molly thought back to her offering Sherlock coffee, she had wanted to go out for coffee, to talk to him, maybe get past that mask he always had. She wanted him to see her.

Jim took her for coffee, Jim was happy to chat or more precisely he liked to listen. He was attentive; asked her about her job, asked her about her interests and friends. He had been patient when she was angry because Sherlock had upset her again. He listened when she told him about the insults and dismissive behaviour.

Why then when he had been so kind had he not turned up tonight? Molly frowned. It didn't make sense. And the real question; why when her boyfriend had stood her up was she here wondering where Sherlock was? was he at home? On a case?

Sipping her coffee Molly wondered what he would do if she turned up at his door. Would he invite her in? Would she be brave enough to tell him how she felt? Confess her dreams and desires? Shaking her head she finished her coffee and the file she was working on and put them back in the drawer. She must be more tired than she thought.

He phone vibrated in her pocket. Picking up her bag and her coat she turned off the lights and walking down the corridor opened the text message. It was from Jim,. He apologised for standing her up said he had had to meet an old friend. He would make it up to her.

Back on the tube Molly looked at the headlines on the paper of the man sat opposite her. It said the hostages had been released. Molly smiled, she bet Sherlock was involved. He was always involved in these things it seemed. once home Molly began to get ready for bed. Maybe tonight she would dream about Jim instead of Sherlock, maybe.

73~73

She had been lying awake for an hour. She had played a game on her smart phone, checked her emails and was now staring at the text she had just typed out her finger hovering over the send button. Closing her eye she hit send. Maybe she should have had that coffee, lying awake to see if he would respond was almost worse than dreaming about him!

She turned over and stared at the ceiling. Maybe it was Jim she should have sent the text too, she should have invited him over and then she could have proved to Sherlock he wasn't gay. Turning back to stare at her phone she knew she wouldn't do it she really wasn't interested. It was always just him. The one she knew would never look at her as she did him.

She nearly fell out of bed as her phone lit up in response. Grabbing it she opened the message.

The phone hit the wall and shattered. Why? Why was he always right? OK so he hadn't said this would happen but he had told her she was wasting her time and he was right. How could her Jim be a criminal? Had he been using her? Sherlock said he had, using her to get to him. Closing her eyes and curling into a ball Molly tried to sleep. Maybe tomorrow would be better.

73~73


	2. Chapter 2

_He was kissing her, it was only his lips touching her and only just. Grazing softly. She could feel his breath, warm and steady. She lifted her head trying to get closer. She wanted to feel him, all of him. Suddenly he flipped her over. The gentle teasing gone. He held both her wrists in one of his hands as his traced kisses down her neck, along the curve of her spine, until he reached the barrier of her top. Pulling back slightly he slipped the straps down her arms then continued kissing. Molly squirmed she could feel her arousal pooling between her legs and she wanted to feel his mouth there._

**Crash!**

Molly sat up with a jolt. That bloody window cleaner! Every week he came round crashing his ladders and buckets. Why today though! Why now!

It was because she had seen him yesterday. She had had another dream because she had seen Sherlock yesterday. He had been at the hospital with that policeman. He hadn't seen her. Since that débâcle over Jim she had tried to avoid him. He was bad enough normally; to have him say 'I told you so' to her face was more than she could stand at the moment. Her colleagues had been bad enough. She had seen the sniggering and heard the whispers but she was able to ignore them. It was him that she cared about.

The dream had just been getting good too. She hadn't had that one before. Normally he was gentle and soft and romantic. But this dream he had been more adventurous. Damn the window cleaner!

Knowing she would not be able to sleep now Molly got up and showered. She needed to go shopping anyway so she might as well make the most of the early wake up call.

Wandering round the supermarket Molly glanced at the magazine and papers. He was featured again. His fame was rising. That hat looked so cute! Knowing he was on a case Molly was hoping he would need to come to the morgue soon. She needed to face him, she couldn't avoid him forever.

She was just rounding the end of the aisle when she heard shouting. Looking up she saw Sherlock's friend. What was his name? James? Ben? John? Yes John. he appeared to be shouting at the automated cash register. He was obviously as weird as his friend, and she had thought he was the sensible one! Avoiding the stares being directed at John Molly edged round the aisle and made her way towards the wine. Maybe tonight she would invite the girls from work round. At least then she wouldn't be sat in on her own.

73~73

"So Molly, now that weirdo Jim has disappeared any other men on the horizon?" Jenny asked.

"No, think I will give men a miss for a while." Molly smiled "Jim was enough to cure me of men completely really but I am sure given time I will be ready to meet someone new."

"What about that Dr guy who works with Sherlock. He's single isn't he?"

Molly laughed, "and as weird as his friend, I saw him today in the supermarket shouting at a machine. I tell you I am better off on my own!"

"Yeah she could have a point," Sammy laughed, "my hubby is just a waste of space most of the time, molly you need to get out there and have fun. We should do this more often, you always keep yourself locked in that creepy morgue. Come out clubbing with us next weekend, tonight even lets go tonight. It'll be fun!"

"Oh I don't know," Molly hedged. " And my lab is not creepy!"

Laughing the conversation turned to their fellow workers at the hospital; who was seeing whom and slagging of the bosses. By 11 the girls said goodbye to Molly having failed to get her to go clubbing. Molly smiled as she locked the door. It had been a good night. She had enjoyed it much more than sitting watching some talent show. So marking it down as a success she began tidying up. Her friends mocked her obsessive cleaning, she put it down to her training and job, they said she needed to loosen up. Tonight she just needed to sleep.

73~73

_He was watching her, his gaze tracing her body. He stood before her in just his trousers, his bare chest smooth and inviting. _

"_Come here," she said, wishing her voice didn't sound quite so needy. He took a step towards her. He traced one hand down the side of her face softly brushing her hair behind her ear. _

_Bending he whispered "shhh" and placed a finger to her lips. _

_Not wanting to stop him Molly lay still hardly daring to breath wondering what he would do. She let her eyes move over his body. He look so tall stood over her. Although slim his stomach and chest showed muscles she would not have guessed he had. As he moved beside her his trousers brushed the side of the bed drawing her eyes down. She could see an outline of his penis through his trousers, he was not even touching her just walking round looking and she had caused him to get hard!_

_She wanted to touch him. Run her hands through his curls. Stroke that stomach, feel his heat as she rubbed him against her._

"_Sherlock please..."_

"_sshhhhh" _

_He moved again. Sitting next to her this time he picked up her hand and kissed the back of it before pulling one of her fingers into his mouth and sucking it slowly; keeping his eyes on her face the whole time. The sensation of his tongue swirling and sucking on the pad of her finger caused her to squirm. Removing her finger he placed her hand on her breast and said "Show me."_

"_Show you what?" She was confused._

"_Show me how you want me to touch you."_

_Molly closed her eyes embarrassed but so aroused she wasn't about to stop. She drew her finger round her nipple barely touching just teasing softly as she felt it harden before tracing the other in the same way. Opening her eyes she saw Sherlock watching intently._

"_Keep going." he said as her finger stopped moving. She pinched the nipple feeling the pulse shoot through her before moving her hand lower across her stomach; tickling almost the touch was so light. She moved slightly so she could reach her goal easier. Knowing it wouldn't take much she used her finger to brush her curls then moved lower. _

_Letting her finger dip in to her wetness she moved back to her clit. A couple of light brushes was all it took her arousal so high. Suddenly her back was aching into her orgasm. "Oh god! Sherlock!" She called out as the feelings washed over her._

She opened her eyes. He wasn't there. No! Please not again! Sitting up, her breathing still heavy Molly saw the dampness on her hand and realised once again she had been asleep. She had done this to herself. Groaning she thumped her pillow wanting to cry.

73~73


	3. Chapter 3

She had not just had a bad day, or even a bad week; December was definitely a winner as the worst month this year. Laying in bed Molly felt herself blush with embarrassment as she thought of last nights events. She had heard the others talking about Sherlock having an open house. John had mentioned it when she had seen them earlier. She had had the present for ages; had seen it and thought of him immediately. Oh god she wished she had stayed home now.

Pulling her pillow over her head she thought about Sherlock's comments. He had thought she had a boyfriend and asked her if they were serious. Did that mean he was jealous? Of course it didn't who was she trying to kid. He always noticed so much though, the fact he had noticed she had dressed up was one thing, she could have explained that away, but that she had matched her lipstick to the wrapping. Even she had not realised what she had done until he pointed it out. She cringed as she remembered the looks on Johns face. Oh god the policeman had been there too. Perhaps she would stay in bed all day and pretend Christmas didn't exist. Its not like she had any plans or invites.

73~73

The phone ringing woke her. Reaching over she said "Hi, happy Christmas!"

"Molly? It's John, look I'm really sorry to disturb you on Christmas day but you don't by any chance have access to the morgue today do you?"

"Err.. yeah I'm on call, why?"

"Sherlock needs to go look at a body."

"OK, give me an hour, I'll meet you there."

Hanging up the phone Molly grinned. Not exactly romantic, meeting over a dead body but at least she would get to see him. Dressing quickly she called a cab. Waiting on the pavement outside her flat Molly wondered which of the bodies it was Sherlock needed to see. She couldn't remember him talking about the case he was on, in fact it was unlike him. Maybe this was not a police case.

Arriving before Sherlock Molly checked to see who was in. The only possible body was the woman. She was a mess, well her face was. Multiple injuries making her almost unrecognisable.

"Molly! You didn't have to come in..."

"Oh its OK," molly was busy looking at the man with Sherlock, she didn't recognise him but she could sense the tension between him and Sherlock.

"err, the face is a bit smashed up" Molly pulled back the cover. The other man was looking at Sherlock for confirmation. Sherlock asked Molly to pull the cover all the way back. She watched him scan the body. Whoever this was she must have been beautiful Molly thought, her figure was flawless.

"Yes it's her. "

It was his voice that caught Molly's attention. Was that emotion? Oh god, he knew this woman intimately.

"How...?" she looked at the other man but he was already following Sherlock out of the lab.

"And it just keeps getting better." Molly pushed the body back. There was she excited to see him on Christmas day and see him she did. Only for him to confirm he was involved with that woman. Or had been.

She could never compete if that was the type he went for...

Finding a corner shop open Molly bought a cheap bottle of wine. She may as well go home a drown her sorrows!

73~73

When she went to work on the Monday after the holiday the body of the woman was gone. No explanation, no notes, just as if she didn't exist. Molly went to find Jenny.

"Hi, I was called in Christmas day, there was a body in no3 its gone, do you know where?"

"No, sorry, we just got a call asking us to deliver it to an address. No name or details."

"Oh, odd. So how was Christmas did you have fun?" Molly smiled at her friend.

"Yes it was lovely, but I am glad its over. How about you, how come you were on call?"

"Oh I volunteered. I don't exactly have family commitments do I."

"So was it the delicious Mr Holmes, who called you in I mean."

Molly blushed

"It was I knew it! Molly I don't know why you don't just ask him out for a drink."

"Because, oh god Jen, I really embarrassed myself just before Christmas."

"What happened?" sensing gossip Jenny wasn't about to let this go.

"Not here. How about we go for a drink later and I'll tell you then. Ask Sam if she wants to come too, I may as well tell you both together get it over and done with."

By 5 Molly was wishing she hadn't agreed to tell her friends. She should keep it to herself and pretended it hadn't happened!

"Oh can we go somewhere else?" Molly whined. "Everyone from work comes here." She looked at the fox pub and knew if she had to have this conversation she didn't wants half of Bart's to hear it too.

"How about we go get some Chinese and some wine and go back to yours?" Jenny suggested.

"Yes OK, at least then I will be humiliated in private... again!"

Sammy and Jen looked at each other and smiled. Molly was a sweet girl but so easily embarrassed. They had been trying to get her to go out more, meet more people but Molly loved her job and very little else competed.

73~73

"… so then I left!" Molly was now scarlet in the face, her head down not able to look at her friends.

"Oh Molly! He is a shit! But it isn't you, he is like it with everyone honest. You should hear how the police talk about him when they are in the canteen! Hunny, come on. You said he apologised? Well he never does that so maybe he realised how he had hurt you. How you felt."

"Oh god I hope not!" Molly now had her head in her hands.

"Molly I don't get it. You like him that's OK. There is nothing wrong with that."

Molly looked at her friends, should she tell them about her dreams. No, she had embarrassed herself enough for one night and if she started thinking about it they might start again. She had managed a few nights sleep without waking up either panting or dripping wet. In fact the last time had been Christmas eve the night before she saw him. Maybe it was seeing his reaction to the woman.

73~73

It was a few days later and Molly stood watching Sherlock. Even from behind he was gorgeous.

He was examining a phone and he didn't seem happy. When she had asked if it was his girlfriends he had given her one of his looks.

Molly gazed at the curls on the back of his head and let her mind wander, she wondered what he would do if she slipped her arms around him from behind? Or ran her fingers through his hair?

Mentally shaking herself Molly began to look busy. The very last thing she needed was for him to turn around and see her drooling over him!

73~73

"_You've been avoiding me! Why?"_

_Molly gasped. He was behind her she could feel his breath._

"_I'm sorry I hurt you." She felt his arms come around her and she grasped the edge of the bench to stop her self falling. "I'm going to make it up to you make you feel better."_

_As his lips traced her ear as he spoke his hands ran down either side of her body before moving back up and round to the front. holding her close he rubbed against her so she could fell him hard and hot. _

_She moaned. _

"_Nice?" He whispered. She nodded._

"_Molly?"_

"Molly?"

Oh dear lord! She was in the lab and he was still there. Had she moaned aloud? Wanting to die she turned on her heel and left Sherlock staring after her.

73~73


	4. Chapter 4

There is something wrong Molly thought. With Sherlock. I can tell there is something wrong. It could be all this stuff with Jim which means its my fault, I introduced them. He thinks its my fault too he told me I should stay single. But when I told him I knew something was wrong he looked surprised that I had noticed. Not happy, just surprised.

Molly was thoughtful; Sherlock and John were on a job, they had come to use the lab to do some traces on stuff they hsd found on the job, but as soon as she saw him she could tell there was something wrong.

What Molly really wanted was to hold him and tell him everything would be OK. What she had actually done was tell him what she saw and let him know she was there if he needed her.

What disturbed her more than anything though was how he looked at John when she had said he looked sad. She had heard people say they were in a relationship but Molly didn't believe that. What she did believe after today however was that he loved John. How she knew she wasn't sure, but you wouldn't look that sad and try and hide it if you didn't care deeply for someone.

She supposed she should be grateful, he hadn't mentioned her embarrassing herself the last time he had been at the lab, but then maybe that's why he'd brought John this time to protect himself! Groaning Molly bought herself a sandwich and some crisps and decided to eat them in the canteen, hopefully they would be finished and gone by the time she got back.

After the last dream Molly decided she needed to do something. She had made sure she saw more of Jen and Sammy. She had also started going out for lunch rather than staying in the hospital. Maybe if she could just meet someone else she wouldn't spend her life fantasising about Sherlock. His comment about Jim being her boyfriend, telling her not to date, it hurt. What she needed to do was convince him she wasn't interested in him any more; that she had moved on.

"You can have me!" Why had she said that. She was trying to act like she didn't care and she had said 'you can have me.' Finishing her lunch Molly threw her rubbish in the bin and went to find Jen. Asking her friend to phone and see who was in the lab Molly waited, waited until she knew for certain he was gone.

73~73

The afternoon passed quickly, Jen had promised she would go to the pub with her after work so Molly returned and began looking at the mess they had left behind. Shaking her head she wondered how someone so brilliant could function when they seemed to leave a trail of chaos in there wake.

She pondered his latest case. Why was it always Jim. Everyone seemed to think he was brilliant. Well the Jim she knew hadnt been brilliant. The dates that she had thought were so sweet were obviously not what they seemed. Sherlock said he had broken into the Bank of England, how was that even possible! The Jim she knew was clumsy and quiet. Yet Sherlock said he had done so many horrible things. Was it her? was she such a bad judge of character? If she was, maybe she was wrong about Sherlock too.

Having tidied up Molly then began her work. She was late; her extended lunch then tidying after Sherlock meant she was at least 2 hours behind in the work she had to do before she could leave.

She was just turning off the lights to go meet Jen when she heard him

"You were wrong you know, you do count."

Jesus! She almost had a heart attack. How long had he been there? Spinning round her heart stopped.

She had been right; there was definably something wrong. Sherlock then began to talk. Talk to her like he never had before. He told her of Jim's plan, that he, the great Sherlock Holmes wanted her help. He explained what he needed to do and how she could help. Molly agreed.

Pulling out her phone she called Jen and told her that she had a migraine so was going home then she sat with Sherlock and planned. It felt good. All her dedication to her job suddenly needed by Sherlock. Her precision, along with his, would be the thing that saved him. She listened as he told her his plan; she gave him ideas to fine tune the details then he asked her to promise she would tell no one. Of course she agreed, without hesitating she agreed, and then as he asked she waited.

73~73

It was nearly midnight and Molly sat in bed. She had the news on and it was full of Sherlock. How he had died. How he appeared to have committed suicide. How the police were not looking for anyone else.

Molly saw John in some of the shots. The pain on his face made her feel sick knowing the secret she held. That look wasn't because of the loss of an a work colleague; she had been right that was love. But she had promised, promised to tell no one, so now she had to stay here and wait. He said he would be in touch. So she would wait.

73~73

Molly felt him. She felt his breath and then his warmth.

"I need you."

Molly stirred. She wasn't asleep, she was sure she wasn't asleep. She blinked then turned to the sound of the voice. He was there.

"Sherlock?" She whispered.

"I need you Molly. Please."

"I thought... of course I will help, but I thought what happened today … what else do you need."

"Molly I need you. Let me..." and leaning down Sherlock looked Molly straight in the eye and sucked on his finger before tracing it gently across her breast, circling the nipple. Molly frowned, it was like her dream, how did he...

"You were here? I didn't dream?..."

"No Molly, you didn't dream, you have helped me Molly, so much more that you know and now I am going to help you." Lowering his head Sherlock gently kissed her. His fingers continued to stroke and play with her breast as he let his tongue trace hers.

Molly closed her eyes. Oh god please don't let this be another dream!

Pulling back Sherlock stood and shrugged off his coat throwing it onto the chair behind him, turning back he smiled at Molly and sat down on the side of the bed. He started to unbutton his shirt but Molly sat up and began to do it for him. She leant in to kiss him as she worked the buttons open. Once she reached the belt of his trousers she broke the kiss and pulled back to look at him. She squeezed her eyes shut then opening them looked into his blue eyes and smiled.

Sherlock began to take her night clothes off. He kissed and licked each inch of flesh as he exposed it, causing her to gasp and claw at his back trying to pull him to her.

Finally he had removed her clothes and pulled her flat onto the bed. Leaning over her he moved with purpose. When he sucked her nipple into his mouth Molly cried out feeling herself close to cumming.

Oh please don't let it end she thought, I need him.

"Sherlock" she whispered. "I need you too."

He lifted his head and nodded. Standing he quickly shed his trousers and boxers. Molly eyes widened as she looked at him. He was stunning, but she was nervous, his erection so much bigger than she had imagined, seeing her look Sherlock whispered, "we can stop, you don't have to do this."

"No. I want to its just, I am not exactly experienced."

"Molly, you want to stop at any point and we stop, I promise." Looking at his eyes still filled with the sadness she had seen this morning Molly knew he needed this as much she did. Needed the comfort, needed human contact.

Pulling him towards her Molly kissed him again. It was different this time; it was as if she had given him her permission and that was all he needed. Sherlock took control. He pulled Molly on top of him so he was on his back and she was sat on his thighs. His erection between them Sherlock grasped himself in his hand and pumped a few times then held it upright and looked at her.

"Just go slowly," he whispered, "just do it slowly." Molly lifted up resting her hands on his upper arms to keep her balance she let him guide himself to her entrance. The feel of him was so good. As she lowered a little she saw him close his eyes tight, breathing shallow and fighting for control. Molly moved her gaze to his penis and watched as she sunk down onto him, until he was in her completely.

"Molly." He whispered desperately. "So tight... Please..."

He opened his eyes then to look at her and she saw the hunger and need in them. Nodding she gasped as without hesitation he flipped her over and began to move. Slowly at first withdrawing then pushing back he kept a steady rythum. Molly could feel every inch of him. He had his hands in her hair as he kissed her before raising his head and moving stroking her breasts with one hand as he watched supporting his weight on the other. She could see he was wanting more, needed something.

"What do you want?" She asked his gaze flew to her face and she nodded, not sure what she was agreeing to but not caring she had never felt like this before she would take whatever he wanted to give.

Suddenly he pulled out completed and she groaned in disappointment. He pulled her under him turning her again so her face was down on the pillow and her bottom pulled up to his hips. Holding her still he entered from behind. "Ohhhh" she gasped feeling him touch parts of her he hadn't before.

Sherlock groaned. "Molly i'm so close. I can't..."

He leant over and began sucking hard on her neck, his hand reaching round and finding her clit. As he felt he tighten at his touch Sherlock lost the little control he had left and began pumping into her. He was relentless, one finger constantly flicking her clit as she cried out, trembling as her orgasm took over. He didn't stop; holding her tight against him he thrust harder and faster until he shouted out and began to pump into her again and again she could feel him trembling as he almost fell on top of her completely spent.

He didn't say anything just pulled her close and held her.

Resting her head on his chest Molly shut her eyes it was better than any dream! She would keep his secret until he was ready to go back to John.

73~73

**A/N:This is my first Sherlock fic, would love to know what you think ;-)**


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